Jake Pavelka: Your New Bachelor
Posted on Wednesday, October 21, 2009 in Gossip
After being cut by Jillian Harris last year in the Bachelorette, Jake came back not to confess his love, but to warn Jillian that Wes had a girlfriend. While that maneuver didn’t help him win love, it did give him the springboard needed to become ABC’s The Bachelor.
Well ABC has done it again. They regurgitated their successful Reality TV Show Formula that combines a Stud with Nags, Nerds, Hotties & Drama Queens and sequesters them in a magnificent mansion to battle it out using Bimbo Tactics and “Barely There” bathing suits in pursuit of a Hunky, Gainfully Employed Bachelor who’s armed with a Rose & an Engagement Ring. Based on their names, and the research of Kerri Hopkins, which of these 25 Cast Members will become Jake’s Official Co-Pilot and who will go down in TV history as the Most Competitive, Most Annoying, Most High Maintenance, Best Looking, Friendliest & Funniest of the season???
Ashley, Ashleigh, Ella, Kimberly, Michelle, Valishia & Vienna will want the mansion wing that that has the most Mirrors, Laser Hair Removal Services & Spray Tan Machines. Based on their names, these 7 love to look good & they’re going to think they’re the Hottest Cargo on Jake’s Flight of Love.
If having fun were a sport, Ali, Corrie, Emily, Jessie, Sheila, Ella & Michelle would be on the Varsity Team. In between scarfing private time with Jake, I’m sure they’ll be the ones concocting their version of a “Thorny Rose Martini” @ the pool side Tiki Bar, start a kareoke competition, plan a food fight or climb through the the Bachelor Pad’s bedroom window @ midnight for a pillow fight – these 7 just love a good time.
PLS CHOOSE VIENNA
Send Ali home Jake she is just a hater towards Vienna. Please send her ass home I am so tired I hearing her talking shit all the time about Vienna. Send Ali home Jake! she is no good she says bad things about Vienna to the other girls so that she can look good she is a hater. Go home Ali! Go home.
JAKE YOU MADE THE PERFECT CHOICE. VIENNA AND YOU ARE WHAT’S GOING TO MAKE LIFE WORK, AND WHEN YOU KNOW IT’S RIGHT YOU KNOW IT’S RIGHT AND NO ONE WILL BE ABLE TO CHANGE YOUR MIND. SHE’S THE SASS AND SPARK THAT WILL KEEP THE MARRIAGE LIVELY. A MARRIAGE HAS TO HAVE SPARK AND LUST ALL THROUGH IT. JUST REMEMBER VIENNA AND JAKE WHEN YOU MARRY SOMEONE WHO LOVES THEIR FAMILY AS MUCH AS YOU BOTH DO , YOUR GOING TO HAVE TO LOVE THE THINGS AND PEOPLE BOTH OF YOU LOVE TO MAKE YOU LOVE HAPPY. SO TRYING TO BE LOVING AND FORGIVING IT’S SO IMPORTANT. AND REMEMBER ALWAYS, “IT’S FOR BETTER OR WORSE”, NOT JUST THE GOOD TIMES BUT ALSO THE HARD TIMES TOO. BEST WISHES. KIMI
JAKE YOU MADE THE PERFECT CHOICE. VIENNA AND YOU ARE WHAT’S GOING TO MAKE LIFE WORK, AND WHEN YOU KNOW IT’S RIGHT YOU KNOW IT’S RIGHT AND NO ONE WILL BE ABLE TO CHANGE YOUR MIND. SHE’S THE SASS AND SPARK THAT WILL KEEP THE MARRIAGE LIVELY. A MARRIAGE HAS TO HAVE SPARK AND LUST ALL THROUGH IT. JUST REMEMBER VIENNA AND JAKE WHEN YOU MARRY SOMEONE WHO LOVES THEIR FAMILY AS MUCH AS YOU BOTH DO , YOUR GOING TO HAVE TO LOVE THE THINGS AND PEOPLE BOTH OF YOU LOVE TO MAKE YOU LOVE HAPPY. SO TRYING TO BE LOVING AND FORGIVING IT’S SO IMPORTANT. AND REMEMBER ALWAYS, “IT’S FOR BETTER OR WORSE”, NOT JUST THE GOOD TIMES BUT ALSO THE HARD TIMES TOO. BEST WISHES. KIMI